Miss Keri

So with everything that has been going on in my life over the past six months or so, I’ve lost a lot of who I am and what drives me. I can either decide to sit around and continue to feel bad for myself, or I can choose to get back up on the horse, and dive head first into the things that drive me, bring me joy, and make me who I am. So with that, I’ve decided that it is extremely important to get back to work on my one woman show. Time to construct new monologues, and maybe even get back on the road to finding performance spaces. Time to make things happen!

Here is a new monologue I am working on. Keep in mind that this is still very much in the works. Hope you enjoy it.

“He’s Waiting For You…”

Am I the only one who hates the phrase “He’s out there waiting for you?” First of all, HE ISN’T! AND… who IS “HE?” Second of all (or maybe third of all…. I’ve lost track already) Why is he waiting for me? Do I really want to be with someone who just sits around and waits for the things he wants to just come to him? That’s just lazy! And if you like me so much, what’s wrong with a little chasing? I mean, I’m not one of those girls that REQUIRES chasing, but still… CHASE AWAY! Everyone, at the root of many things, just wants to know that they are wanted. I can be dense sometimes. MAKE IT CLEAR! I don’t play games, and I don’t deal in subtlety. I’ve never been great at reading between lines. Be blunt. I prefer that. You think I’m beautiful? TELL ME! You’re only interested in jumping my bones? State that from that start. Can’t promise I’ll be interested, but I can’t promise that I won’t be either.

I have a hard time believing that Mr. Right is just sitting out there, expecting me to fall in his lap at anytime. Call me a cynic, but I have never believed that’s the way it works. And before you charge at me for these comments, let me say that yes, I am well aware that it is “just a saying,” but these kinds of sayings annoy me like crazy. We’ve all been beaten over the heads and forced to believe that Mr. Right exists, and that he is out there simply waiting for us. We all have this deep Cinderella complex which has rendered us all ruined since the age of five. I just wish that someone had told me when I was little that it is entirely possible that I will NOT find Prince Charming, that the magic won’t happen overnight, but that, in time, I would most likely find the guy who works for me. It would have saved me many nights of hyperventilating, and crying over so many Mr. Wrongs.

No, he is not! And if he is, what corner is he standing on?!?!

I was fortunate to do two readings of my show when I was in New Hampshire for the Summer. Readings are vital for me because they allow me to have an audience and get feedback. It’s a great chance for me to show people what I am putting on the table, and see if they are perceptive to what I have to say. It’s a chance for me to take risks, try new things, lay everything on the line, and hear what people have to say about it all when the reading is over.

After one of the readings this Summer, I had a great chat with a man and actor whom I respect a great deal. This man is very near and dear to my heart, and I also greatly respect him on an artistic level. He suggested that I not “be afraid to get dirty.” He suggested that the piece will be all the more powerful if I dig deep, and truly put it all out there. I need to dig deep, not be afraid of the ugly truth, and write about the nasty stuff that makes people uncomfortable. I think he was spot on. I do a great job of masking things with humor or big words. I rarely put it all on the line, and tell people the things that they don’t want to hear.

So… I’ve started to do it. I’ve started to dig deeper. I’m going out on a limb, and writing the truth. Maybe by revealing the demons, they will move out of the closet and stay out. Maybe this is exactly what I need to deal with my issues, and actually grow to be more comfortable with myself.  Sounds like a pretty invigorating concept to me.